With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
