Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
