I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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