I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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