My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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