Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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