what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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