It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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