what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
She bit a glass in half.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
