She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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