3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
