Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
