I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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