My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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