Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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