The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
