omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
