so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize