I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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