there was a trapeze. enough said
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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