I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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