we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
