Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Randomize
