I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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