He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
