Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
