Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
