ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
