But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
