remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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