chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
