It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
