And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
