How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
