Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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