You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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