Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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