I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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