Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
