I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
