i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
