can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize