I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
