he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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