sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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