He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i think im in europe. pls send help
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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