i jhust puked up my retainher.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Alive.
So much puke
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
