new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
