Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize
