Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
