her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
stop calling my apartment porn island.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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